Hebrews 6:19

I love the rest of this verse as well as the next one which says, "It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where our forerunner, Jesus has entered on our behalf. He has become high priest forever, in the order of Melchizedek."

Beautiful words to meditate on this morning. This kind of certainty and promise is not something the world can offer. Security is something I for one continually seek. Security in school, security in my abilities, security in relationships, security in my image and how others perceive me. But He is the only person who remains steadfast and unchanging. We have to accept that fact before we can fully rest on the hope that He provides.

Going on a bit of a tangent, but if you ever get a chance to stop by Jubala coffee in Raleigh, GO. I've spent this gorgeous morning sipping coffee, being serenaded by Bon Iver, and I am always encouraged by the number of people in here studying God's word. Also, 10% of their profits go directly to families and children in Africa. Man, I really am going to miss this place when I head back to Chapel Hill.

finals week

My recipe to get through this week?

Lots of coffee, lots of library, lots of reviewing. And lots of this verse:

"And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4:7

Colossians 3:12

Perfect verse to ponder on this busy Monday night...

I can already feel myself getting into a slump this next week or so. I had a great past weekend (Corey Smith/friend dates), but the projects are flooding in and fall class registration is almost upon me. EEK, college is hard y'all, if you didn't already know that.

But I'm going to relish these next three weeks. I am. Positivity, that's my goal.

crave.

crave: hunger, desire earnestly, seek fervently

As the theme of Campus Crusade's WBR in Wilmington, the word crave has probably summed up the focus of my thoughts and energy for quite a long time.

Here's my list of some past, and current, cravings...

Patience. Meaningful friendships. A solid, godly relationship with a mature guy. Direction. Perfection. A "place" at Carolina. The next step. The ability to stick up for myself. Pursuit of the Lord on a daily basis. Joy. Hope. Wisdom. Community. And most recently, peace and contentment.

Most of these cravings are not sinful in themselves, for God has innately given each of us desires meant for His glory. But problems arise when we become consumed with our cravings, making them turn into idols. I haven't thought about my cravings in this way before, especially since the majority my cravings are inherently good things.

This weekend, I attended two small break-out sessions, one devoted to the balance of friendships and the other about the search for peace. As the seniors shared their testimonies, telling their stories in complete and open honesty, I started to relate to their pasts. I realized that I have been looking to fulfill my cravings in all the wrong places, for the wrong reasons. Anxiety, guilt, and stress have all marked my path toward seeking perfection, and I have tried to look like I have it all together on the outside for years. When in retrospect, I've been an utter mess on the inside. But God has done an incredible thing; He accepts us in spite of our flaws and makes beauty out of our brokenness. He might not answer all my prayers right away, but ultimately He is teaching letting me learn to have patience, another thing that I have been asking Him for.

Even though this year has been an up and down roller coaster of me losing and refinding myself, God has always had my best interest in mind. He's placed people in my life, at the exact moment I've needed them. Some relationships have suffered since I've been in college, I've learned to accept that distance is okay, but others have flourished and left me inspired to grow closer to the Lord. And as I've strayed many times to follow my own plan and go my own way, God has never once returned the favor. He is the father in the story of the prodigal son, the father that kept looking for his son even though he was a long way off.

Two truths I'm taking back from this weekend:

1. Sin isn't just breaking God's rules, it's when we make our cravings into ultimate things.
2. In Christ, the deepest longings of our soul will be satisfied.

"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

2 Corinthians 12:10.

Take Heart

"He has made everything beautiful in its time."

Ecclesiastes 3:11a.

Added to the favorites list.

More details of this weekend will follow in an upcoming blog post...

and I cannot wait to share what Christ has been teaching me.

(Photos: 1. Future wedding dress? 2. Excerpt from Hillsong's Take Heart)

Things I'm loving, Thursday.

Just because.

TEN WAYS TO LOVE

1.Listen without interrupting. (Proverbs 18)
2.Speak without accusing. (James 1:19)
3.Give without sparing. (Proverbs 21:26)
4.Pray without ceasing. (Colossians 1:9)
5.Answer without arguing. (Proverbs 17:1)
6.Share without pretending. (Ephesians 4:15)
7.Enjoy without complaint. (Philippians 2:14)
8.Trust without wavering. (Corinthians 13:7)
9.Forgive without punishing. (Colossians 3:13)
10.Promise without forgetting. (Proverbs 13:12)

Spring Has Sprung

March 1st, 2011.

Technically the first day of spring isn't until March 21, but personally, I declare spring the moment I can turn my February calendar to the month of March. Just the thought of green grass, daffodils, and warm sunshine makes my heart melt.

Even though I probably should be finishing up a paper and crossing off the rest of my to-do list for this week, I can't seem to get motivated. Not three days before spring break. I mean, come on. (And yes, I am in the library blogging. Thanks for asking. I'm mentally exhausted from reading about 30+ articles about health care in the United States.)

My encouragement for today:

"I have loved you with an everlasting love;

I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.

I will build you up again,

and you, Virgin Israel, will be rebuilt.

Again you will take up your timbrels

and go out to dance with the joyful."

Jeremiah 31: 3-4.

And my head told my heart let love grow.

But my heart told my head this time no.

Listening :: to Mumford & Sons for the third night in a row. (Title taken from Winter Winds).

Feeling :: happy that tomorrow's Friday and that I can finally swallow without three doses of ibuprofen.

Wanting :: to wear my new boots asap. Although the temperature tomorrow is supposed to be in the 70s. What is this North Carolina?

Reading :: 1 Corinthians. I just started reading this book this week, but I am already amazed of its relevance to today's world.

This week has been such a blur, I think partly due to the packed schedule I've had the past few days. Phew. But honestly, it's kind of sad how fast this semester is going. I really feel like it was just yesterday I was looking for a roommate, dreaming of college, and picking out things for my dorm. Now freshman year is more than half over, and that's so hard to wrap my head around.

"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him -- but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit."

1 Corinthians 9-10.

It's so easy for me to become disappointed; disappointed in myself, disappointed in others, disappointed when my life is not a-okay perfect. Ever since about the end of November of last year though, God really woke me up. He wasn't allowing those disappointments and tough situations in my life for me just to feel more down and out. He wanted me to realize that I needed to put my hope back in Him. I wasn't going to find fulfillment in pleasing others, I was only going to find contentment when my relationship was back on track with Him. Those disappointments, I feel, were (and are) preparing me for what I cannot even conceive. Only He knows.

Psalm 27:1

The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid?